In any given civic body, obesity is directly proportional to the number of parking spaces per capita.  ¶ 9/26/2002 01:19:00 PM 0 comments links to this post

In international diplomacy, politicians saying pointless crap benefit from translators who add intelligence.   ¶ 9/25/2002 10:58:00 AM 0 comments links to this post

A joke: What do you call someone who speaks three languages? . . . Tri-lingual. What do you call someone who speaks two languages? . . . Bi-lingual. What do you call someone who speaks one language? . . . American.  ¶ 9/23/2002 09:25:00 AM 0 comments links to this post

Cookbooks assume too much grocery variety. What I need is the ten ingredient cook book, like Taco Bell has.  ¶ 9/17/2002 08:53:00 AM 0 comments links to this post

Old European and Northeastern cities were designed with military defense in mind. City planners built walls and forts and barricades in all the appropriate places. Avenues and streets were planned to thwart enemy invasion, not just to assist the flow of traffic. In a similar way, I think modern cities will be planned to thwart public protesting. When the WTO comes to town, cities will need to prevent protests structurally, not legally, since our liberal values prevent legislative bans on freedom of speech. So governments will build defensible congress centers, underground transit routes for dignitaries, and easily closed roads. We'll have holes in the ground for portable / fixed barricades, and riot-proof sheilds for our store-fronts. It will help the state fight the enemy within.  ¶ 9/16/2002 08:15:00 AM 0 comments links to this post

Libertarians say it well.  ¶ 9/11/2002 04:37:00 AM 0 comments links to this post

There are many good reasons to dislike Los Angeles. Of these, my favorite is the fact that, despite everlasting good weather, nobody walks anywhere. I commute every day by walking in Europe. Come winter, I will be freezing my ass off. If the LA people are going to use enclosed transport everywhere they go, the least they could do is send me their weather.  ¶ 9/09/2002 05:38:00 AM 0 comments links to this post

I'll believe in artificial intelligence when Microsoft Word is equipped a "spell check," "grammar check" and "idea check."   ¶ 9/07/2002 10:29:00 AM 0 comments links to this post

Recently a friend of mine noticed two Mosquito bites right next to each other on her leg. This disturbed her for awhile until I suggested that maybe a boy and girl Mosquito had landed on her for a romantic dinner together. They're probably already married, retired and have thousands of grandkids. This lifted my friend's spirits.  ¶ 9/02/2002 08:59:00 AM 0 comments links to this post